Heartbreak Ridge (1986)

I have seen many war films in my time. We Were Soldiers, Platoon, Apocalypse Now, Saving Private Ryan, Enemy at the Gates, and Full Metal Jacket. Those are just a few of my favorites. Now I can add Heartbreak Ridge to the list. Clint Eastwood is superb as Gunnery Sergeant Highway. The film follows the format of most war films. Training, bonding, and finally combat. This film spends a large amount of time in the training and bonding phase and basically follows Eastwood at the end of his career as a marine in a super shitty assignment. Eastwood takes a bunch of misfits (led by Mario Van Peebles) and makes their unit the best in the division. One of the things I really enjoy about this film is the fact that Eastwood consistently proves that he is the baddest mother fucker around and will not take any shit from anyone.

Heartbreak Ridge shows what happens to an old marine that lived for combat and now has to take shit from younger superiors, underlings, and even an ex-wife. Rising above all the bullshit is Eastwood's performance as a sore-throated bastard that won't take shit from anybody (yes I said this already and YES it needed to be repeated). The film ends with the conflict in Grenada. Of course our heroes kick ass and take names in the final battle. Eastwood defies his stick in the mud superior and a general is proud of that action as a badass. Not much else to say about this film, but if you enjoy Eastwood and don't mind military films, then watch this film. It won't be the best war film you ever see, but it is quite enjoyable to watch Eastwood in one of his best (as far as not taking shit) roles.

"Just because we're holding hands doesn't mean we are gonna take warm showers in the wee hours of the morning..."

The Town

The other day I went to the morning movie ($5 versus $10) to see 'The Town' starring and directed by Ben Affleck. The film is a typical heist movie that centers around a small community in Boston known as Charlestown. Several crews operate (though we never see any other crews) throughout the city, but have their base in Charlestown. They are very smart (criminally speaking), highly successful, and very calculated bank and armed truck robbers.





This summer I watched another film (Takers) and found it to be horrible. Horrible might be a bit strong, but it was predictable with very poor acting and almost an unbelievable story. Why would I bring up this other film? Partly because you need some sort of comparison to The Town. Some would say that Heat is the best comparison, but I think The Town is better than both Heat and Takers. Why? The acting is superb. Seriously great. You feel each of the characters emotions throughout the film. Jeremy Renner stills the show as the tough guy, with Jon Hamm throwing in an absolutely brilliant performance as the tough talking FBI agent.

The film is a bit long and like any caper or heist movie, there is an air of predictability. However, one moviegoer that happened to be in the theater with us was quite surprised at every turn...shocked even. Gasping and shouting at the screen. Hilarious. But I digress. The Town is a predictable film. You kind of know everything that will happen, but it makes the journey to get there interesting enough to keep your attention.

So what is my final ruling? 3.5/5 stars. Great acting, poor 'shock' factor as far as plot goes, and a very interesting subplot that allows for some motivation for Affleck's character.

Watch it and enjoy it, but remember that in most heist movies the ending is usually predictable.

INCEPTION

Click here for the trailer!

WOW

That word was on my mind the entire film. First, a great caper movie. Then an excellent premise and idea to push the caper to new depths of imagination. To say the film has depth intellectually is an understatement. So many aspects of the film are in play at all times. The thrill of the movie is almost always at a 10.

So there is the praise. We enjoyed it immensely. I want to watch it again...SOON.

*SPOILERS* (perhaps)

*SPOILERS*

*SPOILERS*

*SPOILERS*

Ok. These may or may not be spoilers.

Dreams can be synced and controlled. Meaning that two or more people can share the same dream and interact. This is explained in better detail in the film (I won't attempt any greater details). And within one dream, you can then sync dreams further (and so on and so forth)...got it? (I'll be saying 'got it?' a bunch of times)

But the movie is about the origin of an idea. Can an idea be planted within someone's mind WITHOUT them realizing that the idea originated from someone else. Got it? It is easy to steal an idea (which our 'heroes' or anti-heroes have already shown they can extract), but the ability to input new material into a subject's mind without their knowledge is thought to be IMPOSSIBLE...or at least IMPLAUSIBLE.

The acting in this film is flawless. Nothing seems forced, everyone works...everyone! The action is, at best, impressive and at worst ridiculous. The hotel fight scene is something to be awestruck by and the snow 'level' battle is completely badass. And now the plot. It works. I won't go into exact details, but let us just say that things that lurk in your subconscious play a huge role in your dreams.

Inception is probably the best concept in quite some time (think 'The Matrix') and executed in a way that is almost sure to win an Oscar for something. Most likely Best Actor for Leo DiCaprio or Best Supporting Actress for Ellen Page.

So go watch Inception and prepare yourself for 2.5 hours of the most unique movie experience in quite some time. Get all your food and drink BEFORE the movie. Pee before the movie. You will miss out if you miss any piece. Too many things are happening throughout the film. Too much action, story, excitement, etc.

GO WATCH INCEPTION!

Recovery - Eminem

Eminem has a new album that will drop tomorrow (June 22nd, 2010). This is his first studio album in about forever (ok...maybe since last year, but whatever) and it is his seventh studio album. To me, this album is kind of a look back on his life of fame. He apologizes for not really coming with fire of late and even speaks about being jealous of other rappers (Kanye and Lil' Wayne). And of course, he shits on Mariah and Nick Cannon. Nothing is off limits in this album, a couple Michael J. Fox references and even a reference to Michael Jackson and his hair catching fire. Each song has compliments his style and the message held within. The beats and production are all on point given the subject matter of each track.

This album makes Eminem seem much more mature and introspective. Even in the songs where he is just shooting the proverbial shit, he keeps 'on message'. That message is that I'm back and literally dropping knowledge with every word.

My favorite tracks so far are (in no particular order) Talkin' 2 Myself, On Fire, Going Through Changes, Seduction, No Love, and 25 to Life. All the tracks bring something interesting to the table and I find myself unable to skip any of them (even W.T.P.). The test of any great album is the ability to replay it several times and never be irritated. This album has that potential (I have listened to it about 15 times over the past two days).

So go get Recovery by any means necessary...I give it 5/5.

Hot Tub Time Machine

Recently (read yesterday) I went out with my lovely wife for a night on the town. The night began with food and then realizing that we were late for our movie. This made us stop in at a bar (MoJo's Lounge...affixed the cup of joe in the mall) where we experienced a great happy hour and some of the OSU NCAA basketball game (they lost...another blog, another time). We each had two drinks (rum/coke, 2 whisky/ginger ale, Guinness) and were ready to leave (so we wouldn't be late for the new showtime), but alas, the barkeep friend we had made the week before gave us a free beer (joy/sadness). That beer didn't last long (devoured). [note the overuse of parentheses] We hurried into the theater, found our seats, and still had at least two previews left. By the way, why do movies have so many previews in 2010? I realized this trend back in 2002 during a trip to Puerto Rico (15 previews and commercials...I shit you not). But what is the explanation?

Finally it was time for Hot Tub Time Machine. But only after being told not to ruin the movie by adding our own soundtrack. What the fuck? I can't laugh now? Fucking movies. Anyway, the movie begins in several hilarious ways (showing each of our heroes lives) and we learn a little about each of them. Then they take a trip and we learn of the hot tub. Keep in mind that I was already DYING of laughter before this part of the film. I can't explain the jokes, but if you enjoy raunchy, irreverent humor, then this film has your name ALL OVER IT!

The film has plenty of dialogue, gags, and running jokes to keep you cracking up. I highly recommend you take some time and watch Hot Tub Time Machine. I give it 5/5. Or maybe 4.5/5. I should check Lougle and see what RottenTomatoes.com gave it...(inside joke)

SL Music Review: Blueprint 3 (SL= Steven L.)

I have it. 10 days early at that; and I am listening to the full thing. I'll give you a track by track rating....

Track 1 "What we Talkin About" 3/5

Nice line includes one from the concert freestyle " I ain't talking about Jimmy I ain't talking about Dame."

Track 2 "Thank You" 4/5

Really like this track. Good production and horn section. Jay's flow is the one we know and love kind of like, dare I say, before. " I was going to kill a couple rappers but they did it to themselves/ I was going to do it with the flow but they did it with their sounds." On repeated listenings, this track really sounds like it could be the bonus track on the classic Camp Lo album "Uptown Saturday night". One of the top 3 tracks on the album.

Track 3 "DOA" 3.5/5

I am certain you all have heard it. I like the track, with by far the hottest line to me being "You n***** jeans to tight, you're colors to bright, you're voices to light" I've been screaming that for YEARS.

Track 4 "Run this Town" 1.5/5

Don't like it. The less Rihanna appears on Hip Hop albums, the better.

Track 5 "Empire State of Mind" 3/5

Nice production. Alicia Key's part really adds to the song. Jay's flow is still recovering on this track.

Track 6 "Real as it gets" 2.5/5

Jeezy rhymes first with a couple nice similes, Jay follows with a normal flow. Nothing jumps out at me.

Track 7 "On to the Next One" 4/5

At first I thought this beat was trash, until I got about a minute into the song, I realized Swizz is a sorcerer. The beat coupled with Jay's flow is crazy. Talks about the progression of the game and defending why he moved away from his Reasonable Doubt style.

Track 8 "Off That" 2/5

This song gets that score just off of the strength of not having Jimmy spit a verse. Not feeling the production.

Track 9 "A Star is Born" 3/5

Talks about the stars that came after him in the game and how they have done, and gives them a "clap".

Track 10 "Venus vs. Mars" 3.5/5

Heard this one a while back as well. I like the metaphor, as well as the beat. Flow as well as production really favors LL Cool J circa "Doin It" and "Hey Lover."

Track 11 "Already Home" 3.5/5

Nice strings, good flow. Jay's 2nd verse much better then the first.

Track 12 "Hate" 3.25/5

FINALLY. Kanye rhymes without autotune. Interesting rhyme scheme between the 2 of them. Wish they were a bit faster with it though. Edit: They actually get faster with the flow about a minute and a half in. Ye could have done a better beat though.

Track 13 "Reminder" 3.75/5

Jay's flow is nice on this one, nice beat. One of the better tracks on the album.

Track 14 "So Ambitious" 4.10/5

Love it. Plays like part 2 to excuse me miss, but more a life mission/bragging tale/goal setter.Pharrell brought a grade A beat, unlike 'Ye. Listen to it on a lazy Sunday afternoon driving with the sunroof open on the way to pick up a snow cone with your chick. Sorry, my mind was wandering. Hot song.

Track 15 "Young Forever" 3.0/5

A direct example of Jay's "new" sound. Very much a ballad. Nice message with the hook.

Track 16 Ghetto Techno 2.0/5

Only reason I give this score is because of the beat, and the fact that I was really expecting Ain't I or so many other tracks that should have been at the end of this album. Jay trying with the Em flow at the begninning.

Final score: 47.1/80

An OK album with a few notable tracks, but lacks the "listenability" of his earlier releases (almost anything pre black album).

Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince

Here's my review...

This film has the necessary elements to not totally piss off those who have read the book and it will totally intrigue those who have only seen the movies. What does that mean? It means it has the action, story, special effects, and comedy to make a well rounded film that is quite enjoyable.

The book that is paired with this film centers around the development of young Lord Voldemort (or Tom Riddle). Its focus is on his family history and difficult childhood. This film misses out on a lot of character development of Tom Riddle. However, I contend that the film series provides enough information to show that Tom Riddle is extremely evil and had a troubled past before even attending Hogwartz. I will also state that the film only has a limited window and has to catch your attention much faster than any book (books are usually drawn out with extra details and unnecessary information). Having said that, let's get to the review.

Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince is probably the second best movie in the series (this is not to say that it was the closest film to its respective book) after the Prisoner of Azkaban. It has suspense, story, action (am I repeating myself...thought so), etc. The film begins with a great opening sequence of Death Eaters attacking both the Wizard world and the Muggle world. And from that the film really never slows down. I think they did a great job of explaining the Harry and Slughorn relationship as well as telling the story of Draco Malfoy. Some things were left out, but overall the film worked for me.

This movie will be a great summer film in a series of terrible summer films (Wolverine, Transformers [yes, too long, boring story...], etc.) and will be enjoyable for many folks. My rating? 4/5.

BLACKOUT 2 Review

Here is my Blackout 2 minireview: GET THIS ALBUM TODAY. That is pretty much all that needs to be said about the Method Man & Redman new album. First, we know these guys can flow with some of the best, but the greatest aspect of this album is the fact that it is so HIP HOP. What does that mean? Its rough, raw, has club appeal, and will make this a great summer for anyone who gets the album. I couldn't find one song that I didn't enjoy on the album. Seriously. It reminds me of some other great albums in Hip Hop history. Name one and it can be in the same paragraph at the least. Take the album for what it is, a critique of the current direction of the industry, a great summer album, and some slick lyrics. None of that New Age Hip Hop shit.

What are some of the standout tracks? A-Yo, Dangerous Mcees, I'm Dope Nigga, Errbody Scream, City Lights, Mrs. International, Dis Iz 4 All My Smokers, and many more. I just listed most of the album. The whole thing stands out. And I'm not the only one. Most of the people who have heard the album are saying that it proves Hip Hop is still in the land of the living.

So that is my minireview. Go get this album in whatever method you usually get your music. You won't be disappointed. I give this newest work from Method Man & Redman a 4.5/5. That means it may be one of the best albums of the year. BELIEVE IT.

Review of Kobe Doin' Work

I caught Kobe Doin' work thanks to my trusty dvr, and let me tell you, dont start watching this movie expecting to get some insider knowledge of the lakers or kobe. It was pretty much a puff piece following Kobe during a 2008 regular season game against the Spurs. Ironically, Kobe didnt actually do much work ending with 21 and not shooting that well. I will say though that after viewing this, it is clear to me just how physical the NBA is. On almost every play, contact that technically is illegal occurs, and Kobe is no different. The amount of shoving, grabbing, and sleight of hand fouls during shot attempts is quite amazing. I also got the clear feeling that Kobe was acting differently from how one would normally act with 30 cameras watching his every move. His fake laughter and overeagerness to be chummy with his team sickens me, especially because I have read several accounts (The Last Season: A Team in Search of Its Soul) which portray him as a complete selfish idiot. The little things in his mannerisms become more pronounced, like him wiping his hands on his jersey at least 30 or 40 times. Also as good as the cinematography is, they must have shown his hideous shoes 10 times in the film, even him untying them after the game.Overall, i wish Spike had followed Lebron instead or had the presence of mind to capture Kobe's 61 point game on film against the Knicks. Nothing extraordinary, i grade it a C+. As far as ESPN productions go, I strongly recommend you check out Through the Fire about Sebastian Telafir's journey to getting drafted into the NBA. Much better stuff.

Twitter!

The following is a brief discussion on Twitter. Enjoy

Theo
Ok. So the three of us have joined Twitter and now Twitter is going mainstream. Here is some of the things I don't like about Twitter, random followers that aren't real people and fake celebs. Other than that and the fail whale, I think it is a great communication tool. Let's talk about the bad of Twitter before we discuss the good. Any other things you two can think of?

Steven
I actually like the fake celebrities, some of them are hilarious, especially Darth Vader, Yoda, Fake Bill OReilly, etc. I wish Twitter didn't have consistency issues like being turned off. I txt off at night, and it takes anywhere from 2 minutes to never for it stop updating me on the people I am following. That gets frustrating...I also would like the option to do threaded twitter messaging with selective people I follow/talk to.

Theo
I guess when I said fake Celeb, I mean the ones impersonating a real celeb (Seth_Rogen) or celebs who have assistants write their tweets (ala Brittney Spears). I turned off the text updates, too invasive for me, due to the fact that I can check the Twitterfon app every few minutes or whatever. I think the "threaded twitter" idea (something similar to Gmail reply all, etc.) is great. That way some conversations would only include certain people. I recommend that no one use Twitter via the internet unless you wanna make friends with the fail whale. I would say a twitterclient or text is your best option.

Fabrice
The thing I like about twitter is the speed at which it operates. It's still amazing to me when I put up an update and 4-5 people have seen that shit and responded. I also like the way me, you Steve, Alexis, Matt, and the rest of our crew get together at night and have our random convos. It's like an AOL Instant Messenger conference call or something.

You can help us keep the discussion going by adding your comments! We'd like to know what you think of Twitter, so be sure to share!

Death Race Review

Death Race is loosely based on the film Death Race 2000 (an interesting film with hilarious special affects and a pretty good cast) except it lacks the political preachiness of the original. Death Race is set in the future after a collapse of the economy. Our hero is a hardworking factory employee, an ex-con, and a former race car driver. His factory gets shut down and he only got paid $300 for 120 hours of work. Cut to him being set up for his wife's murder and 6 months later heading to the Death Race island prison. The female warden (also one Pamela Landy from The Bourne Ultimatum) is a hardass bitch and she is responsible for bringing him to the prison. Another driver (the best supposedly) is named Frankenstein and he dies in the beginning. However, she keeps his legend alive and wants our hero to impersonate him. Why? TV ratings. This storyline is completely bogus. Not at all believabe, but who cares? It's all about the ultimate in auto destruction. Frankenstein is an audience favorite who just won't die. Hilarious.

The race has three stages. During the first stage, it's clear that one of the racers acting on the wardens orders killed his wife and stole his daughter. This movie has a lot of interesting little funny parts, but I think the movie is good for one reason: it's so fucking bad. I mean, terrible plot aside, it is really bad. The unintentional comedy is high and I would recommend it to everyone. LOL.

Now back to the film. The original had a somewhat political message. So far, this one has none to speak of. No worries. It will be all about fast cars and big wrecks. Also, Tyrese has a line about "racecar reflexes" that is hilarious! Not because it's funny, but because he is so serious as he says it. In stage 2 they teamed up to survive (and our hero gets revenge on his wife's killer). But in stage 3 we will have the final "battle". An attempt at winning your freedom. Stage 3 will have sabotage, intrigue, and more blood and guts than the previous stages combined! Do you want to know what happens? Well, like Tyrese says, real brave coming over here. LOL. What does that mean? Not a damn thing. I give this film 5/5 on the "weird action movies that you can watch because they are unintentionally entertaining and have good action" scale. I put it somewhere inbetween Mad Max, Commando, and Death Race 2000. Don't worry about the many plot holes and terrible lines, but enjoy the insane action and ridiculous premise for what it is: FUN.

Guest Review of Angels & Demons

This is a guest review of Angel & Demons, by Anthony Davis (Oakwoodite and Twitterer, as well as a Mac specialist). Check him out here.

So I went to see Angels & Demons last night at Monaco (Huntsville, AL). I already knew that I would enjoy the atmosphere of the theater. The Scene Lounge always has a great feeling about. There's a level of sophistication there that doesn't feel native to Huntsville. I enjoyed a few drinks with friends and strangers before we headed up to Prive' (VIP balcony seating). A couple trailers played, though none of the blockbusters scheduled to release this summer. The only trailer that I did get excited about was for the Johnny Depp and Christian Bale movie Public Enemies. I believe that this is the type of movie that The Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford should have been.

Now I must admit that I go into Angels & Demons having never read the book by the same name or having read The Da Vinci Code . Only understanding that it was the sequel to blockbuster The Da Vinci Code which I have seen. I also go into the movie knowing that the religious views of the Roman Catholic church differ from mine. But I simply wanted to see a good movie. I enjoyed The Da Vinci Code and had highly anticipated this sequel.

The movie starts of very quickly, not wasting time trying to explain Dr. Langdon's importance or the Catholic church's issues with him. Though the premise of the movie is clear very early in the film, unlike it was in The Da Vinci Code, you are left intrigued by the historical references and clues that Dr. Langdon follows. I've said before that this series is a more complex and clever National Treasure. Though there is no real action in the film, the pace and urgency in solving these clues helps to give you those highs that contrast the lows that are necessary for any film. The sets in the movie are impressive. Especially when you stop to think that many of the scenes were not shot in Roman Catholic churches because church officials forbade it after the controversy created by The Da Vinci Code. The use of CGI for some of the sets were subtle and well done. Director Ron Howard does a good job of keeping you engaged throughout the whole film. The traditions of the Roman Catholic church and the protocol of the Swiss Guard, who protect the Vatican, kept me very much interested throughout the entire film. Anyone who enjoys history and myth should enjoy this film. Even my friends who had read the book said that they enjoyed the movie. I give this movie 4/5 stars.

Biased Star Trek review

The title says it all...I enjoyed the Star Trek series (original, next generation, and the movies...hold the rest of that mess) for most of my life (not a Trekkie or a Star Wars guy, I just like movies...). So, when I heard Star Trek was being remade I was excited. Would it live up to the hype?

We get to the Monaco theater in Huntsville, AL and enter the "VIP" theater. I like the Monaco as a theater...really steps up Huntsville's game. We get into our seats and I plan to sip my Woodford Reserve on the rocks and tweet to my heart's content. Previews for GI Joe and Transformers 2 were good (GI Joe was better), but I think Hollywood is afraid to try new stories. Every big picture is a remake, a book, or a continuation of something that has worked before. This has got to stop...however, I digress.

*SPOILERS INCLUDED IN THE REVIEW*
(scroll down to end of review for final rating)

The beginning of Star Trek is completely BADASS! The movie doesn't really slow down from there. James T. Kirk's father is killed in the beginning while saving his son and wife's lives from a big ass Romulan mining ship that has been fitted for war. From there the movie shows us young Kirk and young Spock. We see some of the events that shaped each character (and made them completely amazing...) and get some great information about Vulcan culture. By the way, Kirk is a complete arrogant bastard and it works GREAT in the film.

The rest of the movie has no real twists or turns, but we do find out a lot about each character you used to love in the original series. The special effects are good (understated, yet well done) and the plot moves. You aren't really waiting around for the movie to keep going...just when you think you can chill, the shit hits the fan.

I guess I can't really go into more detail (so soon after the movie opened) and give great SPOILERS, but I can say that if you like Star Trek you will give this movie at least a B. I gave it an A because it is in my top 5 of the series. WHY? Because I think when it is combined with the series and the original set of films the nostalgia factor is HIGH. It brings everything full circle.

Go see the movie and enjoy it. Don't expect to be baffled or surprised by the plot, but enjoy the greatness of space with your friends Spock and Kirk. My rating? 4/5 stars. Enjoy.

Upcoming Summer 09 movies I can't wait for...

Hey everyone, longtime no post. I've been really busy with school and everything, but I wanted to talk about some upcoming movies I can't wait to see this summer:

In no particular order:

1) Angels and Demons (starring Tom Hanks). Ok, I am sure their is a sizable segment of people who can't understand why I would make this pick, but I loved the novel, written by Dan Brown, even more then I liked the Davinci Code. Should be the mystery/suspense/Catholic libel lawsuit movie of the year. 

2) Wolverine Origins- Yes, I know a good quality bootleg has been available for about a month, but I actually held off on downloading it. Really, the positive reviews I have heard from people who have seen it (especially considering it is the unfinished, dirty copy with little to no CGI) is making me think this will be THE superhero movie of the year, and the first bonnified summer blockbuster of summer 2009. While we are on the topic of Wolverine, I have discovered something amusing about the superhero Genre. A large amount of Marvel fans (of which I am not one) can't stand the movies that come out based on the comic book heroes. They hate them. Some movies of note include Fantastic 4, and Spiderman 3. I find this hilarious, because I feel the exact same way about a Batman movie. I have been lucky that DC has taken care (normally) with how their heroes have been depicted on the screen so the duds have been minimized. The only Batman movie I claim never existed was that abomination with Chris O'Donnell and the Governator, Batman and Robin. Never happened. Much like Rocky V. Didn't exist. The reason I bring this up is  I enjoy attending Marvel movies because I could care less how factual it is to it's comic origins. Doesn't matter to me, I'm there to be entertained, so I can put my critic hat down, sit back, and ooooh and aaaahh with all the kids while the "real" marvel fans are going nuts screaming "His suit is the wrong shade of red!  That villain shouldn't happen until the next movie!"

3) Transformers 2/ Gi Joe. I put these two blockbusters together because I am so happy that the cycle has finally come around to doing 80's cartoons as live action. If you were born from 1980-1985 and heard the theme music for Gi-Joe during the Superbowl commercial you know exactly what I was talking about. Those around me would tell you that I immediately put down my cup and plate and turned up the TV to see what was happening. It was that important. I am still patiently waiting for Voltron in 2010, and so help me, if they try and kill off Optimus Prime in this sequel I will get up and walk out of the theater. I had to deal with that in the 80's cartoon movie. I won't deal with that pain again.

UPDATE: Chris Brown and Rihanna

Ladies and Gentlemen of the internet. This just keeps getting better and better (or worse and worse). Apparently Chris Brown was receiving illicit text messages (texting started the violence?) from other paparazzi starlets while in the Lambo with Rihanna. Wow. Who thought texting could get you thrown in jail...

The fallout from this incident has been pretty bad, so far (canceled parties, appearances, etc.). For the record, I am on Rihanna's side...or at least against Chris Brown. I mean, there is no reason to go hitting a woman (even if she throws the keys of your RENTED Lambo into the street). If she starts hitting you, protect yourself and remove yourself from the situation...otherwise you will become IKE. Ok?

And I am a big fan of Kanye West and Jay-Z now. You can't agree that beating a lady is somehow excusable (maybe in an extreme circumstance where your LIFE is in danger...MAYBE). Chris Brown needed a real man growing up, not his blind, alleged wife beating, stepdad. We really need to quell this domestic violence cycle...violence begats more violence!

And Chris Brown, don't do this! Don't say shit on Facebook about how we'll "begin to see her true colors. Believe it!" We don't give you an excuse for beating her like she was Tina. Ok?

Some potential good news. MTV will air a roundtable type thing on Monday regarding domestic violence (a good thing for young teens without good role models at home) and specifically this situation. And an interesting (and long) essay from Kevin Powell regarding the violence issue. Stay tuned for more "updates".

Street Kings????

Yes, I watched Street Kings. No, I knew Keanu Reeves was in the film. Yes, I need to have my head examined (but I thought Forest Whittaker could save the film...no dice...). Now, I don't have hatred for Keanu "I am an F B I agent" Reeves, but let's be honest his worst acting is also his best acting (it makes sense...I think). Take Neo for example. Terrible acting, but only Reeves could make it work in that film. His slow deliver and seemingly dumb banter played well in that film. However, this is not the case in Street Kings. Street Kings begins with Reeves showing how fucked up his life has become (drinking, etc.). He ends up performing an 'undercover buy' with these two Asians. Insert 'hilarious' racial dialogue (he is LAPD) and the beating he then receives. Now, we learn that he wanted that to happen (obvious) as he locates his stolen vehicle and prepares for 'battle'. He busts in and kills 4 dudes (wasn't a clean shoot), but saves twin teenage girls from a life of sex slavery. He then sets up the scene as if he was fired upon, etc. So he is a dirty cop (not bribe accepting dirty, just pushing the boundaries of the law). We meet his now clean ex-partner and his commanding officers (they are shadier than he). The movies twists and turns with Reeves taking us on several poorly written (not his fault) and delivered (his fault) conversations with fellow cops. The movie is not hard to figure out, but it has a weird ending (I mean...money in the wall...really???). I don't know if its Keanu or the writers', but the movie cop he plays is extremely dumb (he has blinders on for about 90 minutes...its unreal). However, he is also extremely brilliant at times (flashes for nanoseconds or less). If you want to watch Keanu wander through this movie like a dung beetle through shit, then go right ahead (it is fun to laugh at). However, I would stay away. I give this movie 4.5/10. Don't pay to see it (maybe use your Netflix or something.

5 of my favorite Jay-z songs, with 5 more to come very soon...

Alright, somebody had to do it, so here it is:

5 of my favorite Jay-z songs/verses/freestyles of all time:

In no particular order:

Edit: Now before you all go catching feelings I know there are dozens of songs that could make this list. This is just a random 5 I was thinking about that I really enjoy, there will be more list to come. Now stop blowing up my inbox, lol.

1) Hot 97 freestyle (2006) 

"IPO Hov, no need for reverse merger...baby blue maybach, like I own Gerber."

2) Politics as Usual (Reasonable Doubt, 1996) 

"Sucking me in like a vacumn, I remember tellin my family I'll be back soon, that was December

Eighty-five then, Jay-Z rise ten years later  got me wise still can't break my underworld ties
I wear black a lot, in the Ac', act a lot Got matchin VCR's, a huge Magnavox...."

3) Dead Presidents I (1996 Video Version Unreleased/certain versions of streets is watching feature it)

"Handlin' since a teen I dish out
Like the point-guard off your favorite team without doubt
My life ain't rosy but I roll with it
My mind was fine 'till the dough hit it
And told me that the mo' did it"

4) In my Lifetime Remix (1996 Streets is watching soundtrack)

"It's the thought of a ride that make my eyes wide, I'm caught up
I'm trying to make, all of my dreams materialize, so I sorta
say my goodbyes to the straight and narrow
I found a new route, you bout to see my life change
I make the means justify the ends, I make the cream
materialize keys to a Benz, and so I'm rollin
For now, holdin down the fort, who's controllin?
The ground's gotta blow em, yep, y'all shoulda told em
Uhh, my first felony's approachin, copped my first key
Took a freeze, now I'm frozen
I bought a black Mac, I'm outta control
Losin bankrolls on blackjack, you gotta know
it always crossed my mind that Feds be tappin the lines like Gregory Hines
Still on the phone discussin my biz like it could never be mines
I know the price, know the risk, know the wrongs, and the rights
Still my blood flows ice, it's just my life"

5) N**** What, N**** who (99 Originator) ( Volume 2...Hard Knock Life)

"Rapid-fire like I'm blastin a Tec, never jam though
Never get high, never run out of ammo..."

Afro Samurai(Xbox 360)

Afro Samurai
Afro Samurai is a man out for vengeance. As a child, his father was decapitated while he stood 5 feet away. You see, in Afro’s world, there are 2 sacred headbands. The #1 headband and the #2 headband. Whoever wears the #1 headband is the strongest person on the world, and can only be challenged by whoever possesses the #2. The #2 headband is always being tested by those who wish to be #2. Therefore, whoever possesses either headband doomed to live a cycle of endless bloodshed. Afro’s father was the #1 at the time of his killing. Afro’s sole goal now is to get strong enough to obtain the #2 headband and avenge his father by killing the #1. In the process, he smokes lots of blunts.

This storyline kicks off the game. The game is based on the Spike TV series called (you guessed it), Afro Samurai. The show never really got very popular, but it was recognized by reviewers as a very unique piece of entertainment. The animation of the show was handled by a Japanese studio and has a very distinct anime flavor to it. Adding to the already eclectic nature of the show are the facts that the whole thing is scored by the RZA, and the main character is voice-acted by none other than Samuel L. Jackson. So what you have is an afro clad Samuel Jackson carving up ninjas, cyborgs, and men in robotic teddybear helmets(don’t ask) to a pulsing hip-hop soundtrack. I watched the show and loved it. The fusion of ideas and cultures combined with the slick animation made me a fan despite the storytelling missteps. I was excited to hear that a game based on the series was coming out and put it in my Gamefly Queue.

The first thing you notice when you put the game in is how great it looks. The whole thing looks like you are actually watching anime. The character models are great. The second thing you’ll notice is the soundtrack. The game actually has an all new soundtrack and boy is it good. The music is incorporated well into the gameplay. When you fight a room full of people, the music swells and diminishes according to what you do. It’s hard to explain, but it makes the whole thing seem very epic. Controls boil down to a block button, 3 attack buttons(kick, light slash, and hard slash), and a jump button. You can chain all of those to create a whole lot of combos. I’ve been playing a week and still haven’t unlocked all the techniques. You unlock them by killing creatively. Let’s talk about that for a minute.

Wow this game is violent. But it’s cartoon violence so it’s not as disturbing. The game features a move called “focus”. Focus attacks allow you to slow down time a-la-the Matrix, and unleash a brutal attack, that when timed right will slice your opponent in half. Whether you like your opponents eviscerated lengthwise of horizontally is up to you. The game actually keeps track of how many gallons of blood you spill, and how many hands, heads, legs, etc you’ve lopped off. The moves all look really cool because the animations involved are very stylish. The villains talk while getting dismembered too. It’s quite a chuckle to hear an enemy yell “Fuck me!” or “Oh Shit!” as their hand falls to the ground. Within a few minutes of picking up the controller, you’ll be stringing together 20 hit combos and be very pleased with your bad-assness.

So based on the previous paragraphs, you’d assume this game is awesome right? Well, yes and no. The game is a lot of fun, but there are some problems that drag the game down a few notches. The biggest problem here is the camera. The game simply does not point the camera in the right place. This is a standard problem in 3rd person perspective games, but the camera here is inexcusable. You’ll scream in frustration when you are killed by an “offscreen” opponent. You can click the right thumbstick to center the camera, but that barely works. The bad camera also makes platforming difficult. For those new to gaming, platforming harkens back to the olden days of Mario when you had to jump from place to place, or platform to platform. Things were simpler in the 2D days, because you could always see where you had to jump. 3D platforming is usually problematic. Some games manage it weel (ratchet and clank, God of War), but this isn’t one of them. I have fallen to my death in this game soo many times. Successfully making jumps is not a matter of skill here, but trial and error. When I’m playing a game at midnight with the fact that I should be studying in the back of my mind, the last thing I wanna do is be stuck jumping from rock to rock. It happened to me last night, and I just turned this shit off. My last major gripe here is that the game doesn’t always make clear where you’re supposed to go. Some of you won’t have problems with this, but since I get disoriented in 3D landscapes, it’s a huge concern for me.

So, what do I give Afro Samurai? As much as it pains me to have to dock a game that I really enjoy, I have to do it. Had the developers worked out the kinks that I mentioned, the game would’ve been a strong 8. As it stands however, I have to give it a 6.5. The game is fun and above average, but not polished enough to rank higher. You should still give it a rental sometime though. I’m about to go home and play some more when class gets out in about 2 hours.
6.5/10

Superman: Red Son

Superman Red Son
Superman is an icon. Everyone instantly knows the emblem when they see it. Every boy has tied on a cape and pretended to fly around. Superman is a recognizable brand pretty much. What happens when art becomes a brand is that inevitably the soul of the piece gets lost in the process. The movies do not convey who Superman is and what he means in the context of his world. Superman has never been portrayed on film or television as the inspirational symbol that he is in the comics.

Superman is an incorruptible being who stands for truth, justice, and the American Way. It’s a good thing he does too, or we’d be fucked. A being of limitless strength, super hearing, x ray telescopic and heat vision, super breath, freezing breath, and invulnerability is probably the biggest deterrent towards enemy attack since the atomic bomb. But what happens if as Lex Luthor puts it, “he decides to stop playing nice?” What if instead of fighting for the American way, he fought for Soviet Russia? How would the world react to something like that? How would the Cold War have been waged? Would America have become the dominant superpower? That is the premise behind Superman: Red Son. The graphic novel from Mark Millar re-imagines the American icon as a symbol of the hammer and sickle.

Superman: Red Son(SRS) opens with a television broadcast. It appears that the Soviets have a new weapon that will undoubtably tip the balance of power in their favor. That weapon is, you guessed it, Superman. In this alternate world, instead of landing in a Smallvlle, Kansas field, young Kal-El’s Kryptonian spacecraft landed 12 hours earlier……in Russia. That’s right people, Superman is a communist. And with his unstoppable might at the right hand of Joseph Stalin, there is no one that will be able to stop the spread of Communism. Luckily, Superman is not a puppet. Although devoted to the ideals of the party, he is guided by a higher sense of morality and an altruistic appreciation for the value of human life. Superman often saves lives even in the US. It is there that he meets his arch nemesis Luthor.

Alexander Luthor is portrayed in this book not as a whimsical bitch(I’m talking to you Kevin Spacey), but as an absolute genius. He is seen playing 20 games of chess at once while reading a book. Luthor is hired by the president to create a weapon that can kill Superman. Luthor agrees for the challenge, but when a clone of Superman he creates beats him at chess, Luthor’s challenge becomes an obsession. You see, Lex Luthor hates Superman for a basic reason: Superman is not a man at all. He’s an alien, the last remnant of a civilation long extinct. Luthor agrees that Superman does good deeds, but he opposes the fact that humans look towards an alien demigod as a source of hope and inspiration, when we could look to ourselves. Luthor suggests that with Superman always around to save humanity, they will never rise to the challenge and improve themselves. Luthor’s argument is essentially racism, but the argument is compelling in this case. Think about it. If you knew Superman would save you from any train crash, why would anyone invent safer trains? At one point in the novel, it is brought to our attention that no one even bothers wearing seatbelts anymore in Russia. This deep concern for humanity, mixed with a slightly egomaniacal nature(naturally, he wants humanity to be inspired by him), is what has made Lex Luthor a consistently interesting character in comics. What makes his story in this book even more interesting is the fact that because he’s American, Lex is pretty much the hero of this book. I won’t spoil any specific plot points, but I’ll explain a few themes.

When Joseph Stalin dies, Superman reluctantly steps up and assumes power. He only does this after realizing that he alone has the power to truly create a Communist utopia. After a while, the U.S., still clinging to its ways, is the only country in the world not part of the Communist empire. There is world peace, but in the U.S., poverty and civil war. It’s all done very tastefully, I assure you. This comic isn’t “anti-American” in any way. It is just portraying an alternate reality. The questions posed in this comic are very deep. What is the cost of absolute power? Even if you wield it in a way that keeps everyone safe and in line, aren’t you still really just oppressing them? Is Humanity a race of people that will give up on themselves and let someone else do all the work, or will they soar higher every generation through their own ingenuity? These questions haunt Lex Luthor and Superman. In the end, both characters have an important decision to make for the sake of mankind. The ending will resonate with you and make you think long after you’ve closed the book.

What makes this book stand out from the rest is that it is written so believably. There are subtle touches in the dialogue that will make you forget you are reading a graphic novel. The story flows well. It is split into three chapters, each one being a different era of Superman’s reign. The characters age through the years. You’ll see Lois Luthor(There is no Clark Kent in this timeline), go from plucky reporter to wise old woman. You’ll see her marriage degenerate as Luthor’s obsession to beat the Man of Steel grows. Even Superman sports some graying temples. One of the other things that I thought was neat is the fact that so much attention is paid to detail. In this reality, we’re used to the Justice League. Here, they have never met and thus never formed. All the heroes we know and love have different origins and brief cameos. My favorite is Batman re-imagined as a Russian anti-Superman terrorist. It’s cold out there in Russia, so he sports fur on the forehead part of the cowl. Oh, and he hands Superman a vicious beating that you have to see to believe.

Speaking of seeing, the artwork here is AMAZING. The pages all have a kind of red sheen to them. Some comic artists can get a little too “squiggly” with their pencil lines and the page is hard to read. This is not the case here. The art is crisp, well colored, and defined so that the pictures just pop off the page. I love the artwork in this book.

Superman: Red Son is a classic. No doubt about it. I know there are those of you who are out there going “But it’s a comic book”. You guys will enjoy this as much as me. Ok well maybe not as much as me cuz I’m a nerd, but you get the point. It contains great social commentary, and it will give you something to think about. It’s an interesting read especially in today’s times. The book is very accessible. This is a great stepping-stone for anyone who’s never read a graphic novel.
9/10 .

Mortal Kombat vs DC Universe (Xbox 360)

What’s up people? I’ve been meaning to do this for a while, but I’ve had some things going on. Trying to figure out this school thing and still maintain a decent level of sanity is a tough thing to do. I’ve been inspired recently by someone I know who does this for a living to give it a try. I’m gonna review some stuff and try to save you guys from from wasting money, or even worse, time. Some of my personal views on unrelated subjects may creep through, but I’ll keep most of my personal posts on another part of the blog. Either way, you might hear some controversial stuff coming from me. I can’t help it. Hopefully someone will understand my views and see where I’m coming from. Hopefully some of you won’t. I want to promote thought and rational discussion…and in the process have a little fun.

Aight, now that that’s out of the way, I’m gonna review something:
Mortal Kombat vs. D.C. Universe(Xbox 360)
We all Remember Mortal Kombat. I mean, I can’t have been the only kid that stumbled across this machine at the bowling alley and to my surprise, saw what appeared to be real humans completely annihilating each other can I? All I know is that I was instantly a fan. And I wasn’t the only one. Mortal Kombat became famous almost overnight due to public outrage from the religious groups who tried zealously to have the game banned. We all know how well that technique worked for gangsta rap. Indeed, the same result occurred here: Mortal Kombat has spawned at least 7 games, 2 movies, action figures, a cartoon, comic book, etc. These characters are true American icons when you stop and think about it.

What can I say about the DC Universe that fits into a paragraph? Not as much as I want to, trust me. Superman, Batman, The Flash, Wonder Woman, Green Lantern. These are classic characters that have been around for sixty years. I was skeptical of even renting this game but my curiosity overwhelmed me. I was intrigued at the idea of being one of them in a fighting game for the first time ever. Would the makers of the game screw up not stay true to the characters? And then I wondered what Mortal Kombat fans must have thought: “Wait a minute, how does the other side even stand a chance?”

I was actually insulted that a mere human like Sonya Blade could even attempt to fight Superman, a solar powered bullet-proof alien. But the storyline explains how it might be possible in a satisfactory manner. You see, the two Universes in the game are merging. The MK Universe is one that’s based in magic and Superman’s particularly vulnerable to magic. It actually weakens him. So that explains why he can get harpooned by Scorpion’s signature move and not have the blade bounce off. Hmm. That was actually pretty clever. Now I could focus on the learning the controls.

The game uses your four face buttons as punches and kicks. The right trigger blocks, and left trigger lets you sidestep around the ring if you wish to do so. It’s all very intuitive. You’ll be pulling off moves in no time. The timing window for combos is pretty strict though. When you see a good player (or the computer lol), kicking your ass in the air for 5-10 seconds, you’ll appreciate how skillful he or she is. But by no means is this a game that only pros will enjoy, and that’s because the gameplay itself is just so much fun. Anybody will be able to pick this up and have a pretty good time.

To my surprise, this game was good as hell. All the characters played exactly like you’d think they would. Superman is extra strong, so he’s naturally the slowest. He’s got lots of grapple moves. The best one is where he inhales you, tosses you in the air, and spikes you like a volleyball into the pavement. Very cool stuff to watch, I assure you. Batman has all kinds of cool tricks at his disposal like batarangs that fly offscreen and come back and hit your opponent in the back of the neck. Flash is incredibly quick. His best move leaves your opponent spinning in the middle of the ring unable to block at your complete mercy. I strung together a 19 hit combo off it yesterday. The MK characters I don’t use very much because I just don’t think they’re as cool. I’ve played against all of them though. Liu Kang still has all of his signature flying kicks along with high and low fireballs to confuse your opponent. Raiden and Scorpion border on being overpowered. Those dudes have teleports that let them escape pretty much everything. Maybe I just haven’t figured out the trick to beating them yet. But this game is a blast to play. Characters match up well against each other, and everybody has strengths and weaknesses. Except for Catwoman, who has no strengths. None that I’ve yet discovered anyway.

I almost forgot, there are Fatalities in this game. Yup. Fatalities. Raiden can grab Batman by the neck, charge up, and fry him. Scorpion can do his “toasty” move and burn Lex Luthor to a crisp.

What’s funny is that on the DC side, due to what is obviously a contract clause, the DC characters do not perform fatalities. “Boo” you say? What if I told you that you could do “Heroic Brutalities” instead? I knew that would cheer you up. The DC characters get filled with so much of what the game calls “Rage” that they lose control and become brutal. But they do not kill. So if any of you guys have parents out there that won’t let you get this because there’s killing on it, tell them that that’s not really true. It’s worth a shot at least. Examples of said brutalities include the Flash creating a whirlwind that sends you flying into the air and letting you drop while he poses for the camera, and Superman pounding you into the concrete until only your arms and head hang out. The DC villains have fatalities still. The Joker actually shoots you in the head with a gun. It’s crazy. Anyway, the game has less violent fatalities than many of the prior games (where if you ask me they started getting ridiculous). These are still fun to watch though.

I have to give this game a final ranking of 8.5/10. That’s a high ranking for me. I’m not gonna give out too many of those. But this game is just so much fun that I have to give it up. The makers of this game went out on a limb, but the two fanbases have made this game a huge seller. I tried to buy this at Christmas and no store I went to had any in stock. I couldn’t even get my fix at Blockbuster. Even if you aren’t into fighting games, this one’s worth a look. It merits a rental at least. Check out some Youtube videos if you aren’t sold. Play it with your friends. I dare you not to get excited when either of you smash the other into a series of walls or fight while falling from a building. And I dare you not to talk trash. This game’s fun ya’ll.

8.5 out of 10